I am so grateful to you and what you call your ramblings :) this is a human you inspire.
I am so sorry for the complicated grief you are having to go through. I am a therapist and can really appreciate the complexity of your experience.
I have a strange thought ..have you considered ketamine Assisted Therapy? I have been doing this practice with clients for three years with solid, actual positive results clinically.
Thanks for doing what you do and how you do it. Whatever you choose will make an impact:)
You take time for yourself and do whatever helps get you through each day - whether that be studying or more leisurely pursuits. It doesn't matter what it is, as long as it helps you get from moment to moment. And you will get through it and you will be even stronger than you were before. And then maybe please consider getting involved with Labour so maybe I can one day vote for them again!
Just to say, your work was such a help and encouragement to me during 2020 when I felt as though my world was crashing around me. I could not have imagined my country (GB), imperfect as it was, ever embracing racial identity politics. I am half white and half black and I think it hit me extra hard. It was as if forces were trying to divide my family, my friendships, my professional life - EVERYTHING. I used to cry in bed and at random times during the day. Can't explain how sad and colossal it felt, in my personal situation. Anyway - people like you gave me hope and kept me sane - because you had an understanding about what was happening and could articulate it (and even write a book about it!). So, I can't really convey how much it meant at the time (and still does now), but want to say a massive thank you.
And you WILL feel better after time. That is just about a dead cert. Time is the best healer. You'll definitely look back on this time and think, wow, I made it through. Sending a hug.
Wishing you the best as you mourn your mother and work to regain your health. I am a politically homeless American who loved Cynical Theories. If you and James are still on the outs, I hope you patch things up. You both, as well as Peter B, taught me much.
Many people will be wishing you well and praying (sorry!) for your good health Helen. "Cynical Theories" is one of the most important books of the past 20 years. Your writings bring us back to what it means to be human
Thank you for writing as you can, even with a lot on your plate. As you grieve your mom, it's clear she gave you many gifts, including one that prevents you from ever being financially cancelled, no matter what you say or choose to do.
Oh! If you do get a humanist pastoral degree, can we start calling you "St. Helen of Tea and Thoughtful Transgressions?" You'd look awesome in mitre!
Since I first became aware of your work - the grievance studies hoaxes - I've been an admirer. A little while back you wrote an analysis on Twitter of a short statement purporting to express a Muslim viewpoint. It impressed the hell out of me.
It reminded me of what some of the great physicists (like Einstein) were able to do - to tease out significant insight from the briefest of facts. Too much praise? Possibly - but the impact on me was kind of similar.
You'll probably tell me that this kind of analysis is something that any moderately competent undergraduate learns how to do - and that may be so - but where are all these graduates on Twitter? I don't often see the kind of dissection that you are capable of.
Anyway, I'm just letting you know that your work does reach and impact people in a positive way.
But is it enough? That's only something you can decide - and I get the desire to do something that is more 'directly' impactful and help people. Ultimately, you've got to kind of put yourself first a bit - and do whatever fulfils you and energizes you the most.
As for the weight thing - this is, in the words of Sir Terry Pratchett, an embuggeration - as I know only too well. The damn stuff seems ridiculously easy to put on, and a nightmare to get off again. From personal experience I know that getting the weight off a bit, being able to be more active etc, makes a huge difference. It made a huge difference to my moods, my energy levels, my overall health etc. I wish you luck (I wish myself luck, too, because over the last 3 years I've let things slide and got back to an unhealthy weight again).
Sincere best wishes to you and your family as you contemplate your next steps.
When you rejoined Twitter last year. I was surprised and slightly concerned. It's none of my business but I vote for you to quit it. Some people use a monthly generic Substack post as a Twitter substitute, adding each new random thought to the top of the post.
There is a compromise option though ... Lock your Twitter account, leave it locked, rename it to a pseudonym (both the display name and the username), and only accept new followers recommended by your existing ones. You wouldn't be able to directly engage in public conversation, but when you make an insightful point in regards to a conversation you're observing, some of your followers who agree with it would go and make it publicly.
No guillotines for you, my dear! (I can say that since I’m over two decades your senior.) I lost my mother a decade ago. I miss her frequently. I do hope you can power through, but my experience was that it takes much time. Allow yourself to find your own way - it’s a process.
I'm very sorry for your loss, Helen. I love your writing and very much appreciate your intellectual honesty and scrupulousness. I hope you feel better soon. Based on what little I know of you, it sounds like the masters would suit you down to the ground. I'll stay tuned and look forward to reading more.
I’m also sorry to hear of your sudden loss. There’s never a right time to lose a parent, but it can be more acute when unexpected.
In this context, you’ve posed the right question, i.e. what to do Now, as you certainly can attempt all three at some point. And you already seem to know the answer, per your stated personal preference. Of the three, it’s best matched to this sensitive time, as it allows you to broaden perspective, temper heat while increasing light, and deepen your compassion, both for others and yourself.
Interesting that you're considering seeking office in the Labour party. I think that's a bold and exciting idea! I love it! It's a new direction that will be stimulating and confounding in good ways. When one's life changes dramatically it makes sense to do something dramatically new. I think you'd revel in a political boxing ring and you'd get some good and rough grist to mill on for a your future projects.
Besides that, I suggest you get a good bicycle, find a decent bike path and cycle your cares away. Cycling will not hurt your knees and will strengthen your body and spirit. It's hard not to smile when riding a bike.
My two Lincoln pennies. Besides that I'm sending love and good wishes
I am so grateful to you and what you call your ramblings :) this is a human you inspire.
I am so sorry for the complicated grief you are having to go through. I am a therapist and can really appreciate the complexity of your experience.
I have a strange thought ..have you considered ketamine Assisted Therapy? I have been doing this practice with clients for three years with solid, actual positive results clinically.
Thanks for doing what you do and how you do it. Whatever you choose will make an impact:)
You take time for yourself and do whatever helps get you through each day - whether that be studying or more leisurely pursuits. It doesn't matter what it is, as long as it helps you get from moment to moment. And you will get through it and you will be even stronger than you were before. And then maybe please consider getting involved with Labour so maybe I can one day vote for them again!
Just to say, your work was such a help and encouragement to me during 2020 when I felt as though my world was crashing around me. I could not have imagined my country (GB), imperfect as it was, ever embracing racial identity politics. I am half white and half black and I think it hit me extra hard. It was as if forces were trying to divide my family, my friendships, my professional life - EVERYTHING. I used to cry in bed and at random times during the day. Can't explain how sad and colossal it felt, in my personal situation. Anyway - people like you gave me hope and kept me sane - because you had an understanding about what was happening and could articulate it (and even write a book about it!). So, I can't really convey how much it meant at the time (and still does now), but want to say a massive thank you.
And you WILL feel better after time. That is just about a dead cert. Time is the best healer. You'll definitely look back on this time and think, wow, I made it through. Sending a hug.
Amber
I am sorry for the loss of your mother. I wish you good health and great success in whatever you decide to do going forward.
Wishing you the best as you mourn your mother and work to regain your health. I am a politically homeless American who loved Cynical Theories. If you and James are still on the outs, I hope you patch things up. You both, as well as Peter B, taught me much.
Many people will be wishing you well and praying (sorry!) for your good health Helen. "Cynical Theories" is one of the most important books of the past 20 years. Your writings bring us back to what it means to be human
Currently devouring all I can find that you've written or spoken about. I want to reach out and say how sorry I am for your losses.
Please do not underestimate your contribution, I'm grateful for your insightful brain and work.
Do what brings you joy I'm confident it will be a service to us all- Shona
Thank you for writing as you can, even with a lot on your plate. As you grieve your mom, it's clear she gave you many gifts, including one that prevents you from ever being financially cancelled, no matter what you say or choose to do.
Oh! If you do get a humanist pastoral degree, can we start calling you "St. Helen of Tea and Thoughtful Transgressions?" You'd look awesome in mitre!
I wish I could ramble as insightfully as you!
Since I first became aware of your work - the grievance studies hoaxes - I've been an admirer. A little while back you wrote an analysis on Twitter of a short statement purporting to express a Muslim viewpoint. It impressed the hell out of me.
It reminded me of what some of the great physicists (like Einstein) were able to do - to tease out significant insight from the briefest of facts. Too much praise? Possibly - but the impact on me was kind of similar.
You'll probably tell me that this kind of analysis is something that any moderately competent undergraduate learns how to do - and that may be so - but where are all these graduates on Twitter? I don't often see the kind of dissection that you are capable of.
Anyway, I'm just letting you know that your work does reach and impact people in a positive way.
But is it enough? That's only something you can decide - and I get the desire to do something that is more 'directly' impactful and help people. Ultimately, you've got to kind of put yourself first a bit - and do whatever fulfils you and energizes you the most.
As for the weight thing - this is, in the words of Sir Terry Pratchett, an embuggeration - as I know only too well. The damn stuff seems ridiculously easy to put on, and a nightmare to get off again. From personal experience I know that getting the weight off a bit, being able to be more active etc, makes a huge difference. It made a huge difference to my moods, my energy levels, my overall health etc. I wish you luck (I wish myself luck, too, because over the last 3 years I've let things slide and got back to an unhealthy weight again).
Sincere best wishes to you and your family as you contemplate your next steps.
You'd certainly be a wonderful pastoral care provider.
You often joke about your lack of bureaucratic/administrative/financial skills. I'm wondering whether this would make it harder to be a councillor! But Labour could certainly benefit from your input on matters of political principle & philosophy. Maybe you should join a think tank. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_organisations_associated_with_the_Labour_Party_(UK)#Think_tanks_and_lobby_groups
When you rejoined Twitter last year. I was surprised and slightly concerned. It's none of my business but I vote for you to quit it. Some people use a monthly generic Substack post as a Twitter substitute, adding each new random thought to the top of the post.
There is a compromise option though ... Lock your Twitter account, leave it locked, rename it to a pseudonym (both the display name and the username), and only accept new followers recommended by your existing ones. You wouldn't be able to directly engage in public conversation, but when you make an insightful point in regards to a conversation you're observing, some of your followers who agree with it would go and make it publicly.
No guillotines for you, my dear! (I can say that since I’m over two decades your senior.) I lost my mother a decade ago. I miss her frequently. I do hope you can power through, but my experience was that it takes much time. Allow yourself to find your own way - it’s a process.
I'm very sorry for your loss, Helen. I love your writing and very much appreciate your intellectual honesty and scrupulousness. I hope you feel better soon. Based on what little I know of you, it sounds like the masters would suit you down to the ground. I'll stay tuned and look forward to reading more.
I’m also sorry to hear of your sudden loss. There’s never a right time to lose a parent, but it can be more acute when unexpected.
In this context, you’ve posed the right question, i.e. what to do Now, as you certainly can attempt all three at some point. And you already seem to know the answer, per your stated personal preference. Of the three, it’s best matched to this sensitive time, as it allows you to broaden perspective, temper heat while increasing light, and deepen your compassion, both for others and yourself.
Interesting that you're considering seeking office in the Labour party. I think that's a bold and exciting idea! I love it! It's a new direction that will be stimulating and confounding in good ways. When one's life changes dramatically it makes sense to do something dramatically new. I think you'd revel in a political boxing ring and you'd get some good and rough grist to mill on for a your future projects.
Besides that, I suggest you get a good bicycle, find a decent bike path and cycle your cares away. Cycling will not hurt your knees and will strengthen your body and spirit. It's hard not to smile when riding a bike.
My two Lincoln pennies. Besides that I'm sending love and good wishes